What are the odds that I'd walk into a liquor store this morning THE MINUTE the clerk gets a call that her "Uncle Freddie" has died? I need wine. The man has died. Now, how do I ask her "if this label comes in a fruity Chardonnay?" Now, how ...
What are the odds that The Short One can "feel my teeth, Mommy, when I do this?" "Do this" is ... and I swore I'd never blog about nose pickin' ... but "do this" is press his pointy finger into his nose and "feel his teeth."
"Just the top ones, mom."
What are the odds I wake at 3:55 this morning to the sound of The Dog jingling her way into a nest of my decorative pillows and then lay awake trying to mentally arrange a sandwich platter and reconstructing the tee-ball snack schedule to determine which family FORGOT the all-important snack on Saturday forcing many parents to promise their kids a black H2 w/ fancy rims in place of Gatorade and fruit snax?
What are the odds The Big One has again decided to order a lunch tray from the cafeteria INSTEAD of packing a lunch ... in the very last weeks of the school year?
What are the odds The Big One really WILL wear his clothes backward tomorrow for The Official End of the Year Wear Your Clothes Backwards Day on the Calendar of 2nd Grade Goofiness?
What are the odds that it's quiet in my house since The Ones Big and Short have gone to replace their sad, sad sneakers? What are the odds that The Big One DIDN'T want to go SO BAD that he CRIED!?!!? They're s...h...o...e...s!!
What are the odds I'll be able to register The Short One for kindergarten tomorrow w/o thinking that he's going to share FAR deeper thoughts w/ his teacher than "Did you know I can feel my teeth when I do THIS???"
What ARE the odds?
